A week ago, few knew who was this Rod Rosenstein, the gentleman who became the latest road kill by our republican President Donald Trump. Little did Mr. Rosenstein know that his boss the US Attorney General Jeff Sessions and the president were waiting until he was hired to be the Deputy Attorney General in April 2017, before they did their planned dirty deed. They needed to have the right person in place before they could finally take steps to curtail this FBI Trump/ Russian inquiry by firing its leader, the FBI Director James Comey on 5/9/17.
As per President Trump’s directive, all the newby, Rod Rosenstein had been required to do, was pen a memo which was critical of the FBI director without ever referring to the word “Russia.”
Here is the rest of the story…
On 5/13/17, Bill Scheft of Salon penned the following satire, “Who in the hell is Rod Rosenstein? Everything you were afraid to ask about this suddenly important person
“Salon(In this brand new, hastily conceived premise, Salon will use the otherwise unlimited space of the site to profile a person in the news who has until recently lived largely under the radar. And by under the radar, we mean above gratuitous satire.)”
FULL NAME: Rod Rosenstein N. Gildenkrantz
CURRENT GIG: (as of midnight press deadline) Deputy Attorney General
Rosenstein was confirmed by the Senate on April 26 by a vote of 94-6. April 26, coincidentally, was the inaugural “Take Your Fake Bipartisan Support to Work Day” on Capitol Hill.
LAST 5 DOJ J-O-Bs:
- Acting Deputy Attorney General
- Rehearsing Deputy Attorney General
- Auditioning Deputy Attorney General
- Attorney Colonel
- Executive Gavel Varnisher
EDUCATION: Wharton School (Summa Cum Laude), 1986; Harvard Law School (Cum Laude), 1989; Editor, Harvard Law Review; Inducted into Overachieving Résumé Hall of Fame, 1991
MY MARYLAND: Before venturing swampward, Rosenstein was the longest-serving U.S. Attorney in history. As U.S. Attorney for the District of Maryland, he served under both Republican and Democratic presidents, which seems kind of adorable right now. During his tenure, he oversaw marked decreases statewide in violent crime and was responsible for the conviction of numerous corrupt Maryland policemen who didn’t ride in the back of a transport van in Baltimore. In a 2007 Q&A with the Baltimore Business Journal, he explained his job as lead prosecutor to his daughters by telling them, “I help catch bad guys.” To which his youngest daughter replied, “You’re Spiderman? Holy shit!”
MEMORANDUMB: Rosenstein came to national, uh, prominence, yeah, prominence, earlier this week when he was credited with authoring a three-page memo to his boss Jeff Sessions which gave grounds for President Trump to dismiss FBI chief James Comey. In the memo to Sessions, Rosenstein wrote, “I cannot defend the director’s handling of the investigation of Secretary Clinton’s emails. Almost everyone agrees the director made serious mistakes; it is one of the few issues that unites people of diverse perspectives…. No puppet. No puppet. You’re the puppet!”
When the memo was finally released, it contained two and a half pages of grievances against Comey, and a half-page list of rates for Sean Spicer to hide in and trim your bushes.
HMMMMMM: The day before he was fired as FBI Director, Comey asked Rosenstein for more funding for the department’s ongoing investigation of ties between Russia and the Trump campaign. Rosenstein was overheard saying, “Why is it always about money with you gentiles?”